


under her skin

by lordbhreanna



Category: Biohazard | Resident Evil (Gameverse)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Introspection, Missing Scene, Resident Evil 3 Remake Spoilers, Some sexual tension but from Nicholai, shippy but not explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:54:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23615539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lordbhreanna/pseuds/lordbhreanna
Summary: After the train departs from Redstone Street Station, Jill is confronted once more by Nicholai.
Relationships: Nicholai Ginovaef | Nikolai Zinoviev/Jill Valentine
Comments: 9
Kudos: 50





	under her skin

**Author's Note:**

> Another Tumblr prompt!
> 
>  **Prompt sent by anon:** "I would love to see what happens on the train between Jill and Nikolai. He seems glad she choose to leave Carlos behind. Almost proud. I guess he interprets Jill's actions as finally putting her personal safery in front of others'. Nikolai's like an evil mentor figure to her... So, yeah, this is my prompt for you!"

As the subway car is swallowed by the tunnel and they leave Redstone Street Station behind, an unsettling feeling sits at the pit of her stomach. As if she’s making a mistake. As if she’s abandoning her duty. As if something terrible is about to happen, but can’t put a finger on what it is. It’s like a knot in her throat, hindering her breathing. She shifts her weight, clenches her fist in and out and keeps staring idly out of the window. The reflection on the glass glares back—weary expression, cheeks streaked with blood smudges, skin caked in layers of sweat and dirt and scrapes. 

She catches a glimpse of Nicholai from the corner of her eye. He hasn’t moved an inch, his head hanging absently between his shoulders as the sway of the train gently rocks their bodies. All of a sudden, he looks up and their eyes meet on the glass.

A smirk stretches out on his face.

“Already having second thoughts?” 

It comes out like a snake’s hiss.

There is something about this man that makes her skin crawl. It’s not because he works for Umbrella—Carlos and Mikhail do too. Her gut tells her Carlos is a good man working for the wrong people, while Mikhail seems honest about wanting to help the city. 

Nicholai is an entirely different matter. A puzzle piece that doesn’t fit. He reeks of trouble, and danger. His demeanor tells Jill he’s not just ruthless; something more sinister lies behind. And Jill already has had her own taste of betrayal. Despite her doubts, it’s not his affiliations what makes her writhe—no, what bothers her is the way his words have managed to get under her skin. It’s like they have clawed at an injury she has kept hidden. 

Arms folded together, she faces him, staring down from her stance.

“Cat got your tongue now?” he adds, after her silent reply. He lowers his leg from the seat and stands up. He goes up to her, reducing the distance between them with a few steps. “Guilt doesn’t suit a soldier.”

Jill tilts her chin up, scowling back with contempt. She refuses to back down, let herself be cornered.

“I don’t feel guilty.”

He takes one more step, grabs the metal bar above them. A chuckle draws out of his lungs; an unusual sparkle shines in his eyes. Jill needs to raise his head up a bit to face him, both holding each other’s stare. Her lips are pressed together, though her jaw tenses as she attempts to remain unfazed under his scrutiny. He’s too close, bulking and massive against her slender frame. She doesn’t let it intimidate her.

“But you do. Your pity will get you killed sooner than the creature.” Her lip trembles, her brow furrows. “Stroke a nerve, didn’t I?” he says with a hint of arrogance.

Jill needs to bite her cheek, because he has stroked all her nerves—not just one. His words come back and stab at her with violence. 

She can’t pull the trigger. She could barely kill herself in dreams, when the mirror revealed a corrupted monster whose torn apart flesh dripped down her limbs, the net of swollen veins under her skin palpitating as life wriggled out of her and all she could feel was the itch at the back of her mouth and the hunger.

_ Can’t pull the trigger when it counts. _

She refused to abandon Brad. Traces of the mercenary's blood he had spilled are still smeared all over her face. When she shuts her eyes close, dead people are all she sees—and, when she opens them, undead. She knows better than anyone else what this sickness does. Even so, she won’t shoot. Can’t shoot.

Nicholai is right and she hates that he’s the one to have seen through her. That he has somehow probed into her mind and pluck out what she’s been hiding for months, even from herself.

Her eyes narrow, his still piercing her.

“I’m the one who has already survived this hell, so you might want to shut up,” she reminds him, in the end, with a dismissive huff.

She can still pretend.

“Ah, yes. Arklay, right? And did you survive on your own back then?” he inquires with a bite. Jill wants to throw him a retort, until she remembers Joseph’s body being ripped to pieces in front of her, how she could only react once Chris pulled her out of her shock, all the times Barry was there to save her neck. Jill swallows thickly, anger and fear soaking through her face. Nicholai quickly understands and snorts. “That’s what I thought. You S.T.A.R.S. were all trying to save each other and most died for it. Should’ve learned from that.”

Jill blinks, then her nose crinkles as rage takes over her. She stands closer to him and growls, baring her teeth like an animal ready to tear their prey apart. Her voice echoes loudly on the car, not caring Mikhail or anyone else can hear them.

“Go fuck yourself. The only reason you’re leaving town is because I fucking fixed this train.”

Surprisingly, her outburst pries a husky laugh out of him.

“Look at that. She can bite. Good,” he praises, in what she assumes is mockery, leaning towards her. “You could be so much more if you got rid of your bleeding heart, Miss Valentine.” She notices it, then, how for a brief passing moment his stare lingers on her lips before locking once more on her own eyes. It makes her gulp and want to step back, but she doesn’t. “What a sight it must be,” he whispers.

Jill doesn’t have time to answer before he walks away and vanishes to the next car, approaching Mikhail.

The knot in her throat only tightens.

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to write something like this after playing the game, so the prompt was the perfect excuse to do it. God I loved that scene, and the way Jill stares down at him 🔥
> 
> A lot of Jill's issues here were inspired by [FallenGabriella's fic](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23586685/chapters/56594233) and their insights, so I recommend you check it because it's a great read!
> 
> Also, I highly recommend you go read [folkloare](https://archiveofourown.org/users/folkloare/profile)'s take on this idea of a missing subway scene [right here](https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/57991402?show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#comment_303971143). It's a great read with spot on characterization for Jill and Nicholai; go check the whole collection as well and their other fics, really worth it.


End file.
